Better sex, more money, younger skin

Yeah yeah I know…it sounds just like the cover of a woman’s magazine, or a men’s magazine for that matter. These have quickly caught up with what men really want. It all started with David Beckham and the sarong! Remember that? Us humans can’t resist a headline like that. So many people are making a lot of money by selling dubious products on the web by hitting where we are weakest. For years and years and absolutely YEARS I spent thousands, in fact TENS of thousands of rands (I could’ve paid my house off already – see More Money below) on women’s magazines. I’m sure that articles were recycled every year or so. Because there is only so much that can be written on how to lose weight, how to win your dream guy and how to look younger in 10 days. This post is my take on better sex, more money and younger skin. Kinda…

Better Sex:

Some years ago my husband got a newsletter in the mail advertising a newsletter. If he signed up for a subscription, each month he would get a newsletter that promised him that he would discover thousands of secrets that would change his life for the better. Starting with getting free tickets to TV shows (Ag no please!), professional betting secrets revealed (Hmmm…), how to develop brain power while you sleep (YESSS please), what every man needs to learn from women (oh yeah!), a safer alternative to Viagra and it works in 10 minutes (…), why standing on your head can get you pregnant (I won’t be doing the headstand in yoga anymore!), and last but not least, how to have better sex (…). If I look through all the covers of Men’s Health and Cosmo for the last year, these will all undoubtedy be a cover article. He didn’t subscribe at the time (dang!) and this morning he pulled this out and we had a good laugh – better than the Sunday Times for sunday morning coffee reading.

More Money:

Um…well…no more online shopping – sorry Zando. Definitely no gambling (said above newsletter promised professional betting secrets revealed, and how to save R300,000 on your bond repayments). Or buying the face cream below.

Younger Skin:

There’s a pervasive ad on Facebook, it goes something like this, “Mother of 54 looks 34” – or something like that. Anyway you get the drift. What disturbs me is how Facebook determined that I needed to see that ad and pushed it to me. I am not 54 and I don’t buy skin products online, nor do I research skin care online either, but this is the topic for another post. Curiosity got the better of me so I clicked on the link :-). There was a huge long spiel on how dermatologists don’t want you to know this well kept secret. Well if it was a secret, it is no more, is it? IT’S ON FACEBOOK!!! So you have to buy the cream, and if you buy this cream, there is another cream that you can also buy and they work together to keep your skin 20 years younger. Suspicious of a scam I checked on Snopes and Scam Checker but it wasn’t listed – so it must be real. My great- grandmother swore by sweet almond oil. I swear by vitamin E and wheatgerm oil shots in my favourite moisturiser.

I haven’t bought a womans’ magazine in years and my bond is almost paid up. When it comes to skin care advice I call on the most beautiful woman that has been around the sun 69 times – my Mother. Her skin is smooth and flawless, so I reckon that she must know something about it. Re the better sex bit – this is a G rated blog and my nephews are my friends on Facebook, so that’s it for that.

Tell me – do you still buy womens’ magazines? Do you click on Facebook ads promising the fountain of youth? More importantly, have you bought that miracle face cream? What’s it like…?

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